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Saturday, October 2, 2010

别傻了

第几次说设下不会跨越的界限?
第几次说这是最后?
第几次搽干了眼泪?
其实我根本不重要
何以还是重视着自己
傻得可怜
傻得可悲
看着如何体贴入微
却得不到快乐滋味
你们~我们
名词相近,意义却大不同
是我大意
是我粗心
我享受一切
后果如何凄惨
都是个快乐笔记
谁知道刀刀割在我心
对方的甜蜜
会是盐水撒在我心
死亡笔记。。。
早已写下我名字

Friday, October 1, 2010

一个人,就算笑都是苦的

最重的寂寞是身在人群中
却是一个人的无助
回到空无一人的家
加重我的偏激
寂寞真的可怕
我只想哭只想哭
身边的人事物
像走马灯一样
走过你却从不感觉温暖
我好冷
哭过会好点吗?
对于你
划火材般的温暖
一刻温暖,下一刻却让我活在冰岛
我好累
哭一场就让我睡吧
至少
梦中的你们能陪我多一点

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

旧情绵绵

学院假期三个星期
可说多姿多彩
回到家中
才发现家真是我就好的充电平台
见了旧朋友,亦见了旧情人
哈哈
不止一个,而是全部
虽然人物是旧,但感觉依然犹新
我的人就是这样
总希望分手亦是朋友
因为既然我们是因了解而走在一起
不应因分手而抹煞我们的友情与默契
我写这篇部落,希望任何的你们见到
别亦为我想在你们的感情插上一脚
或我想返挞任何旧情
《刚巧全有了另一半》
《解释清楚比较好》
你要视我为敌人
不紧要
但这是对你情人一种天大的羞辱
建筑恋爱需要太多工程
相识,相交,相知,了解,信任,爱护,忠诚,还有一箩箩的材料...
我自问对我所有的情人亦无办法做得到
尤其信任
我吃醋心强,自尊心强
每次骂架我想都是这因素
我坚信我自己是专一的人
我爱一个人能全心全意
非君不爱
无奈我亦曾经为一个更爱的人背叛情人
其余的因我能与旧情人成为好朋友
所以我一直裁定我做得到
刚提到每个旧情人已有了另一半
我该恭喜你们才是
有的戴情侣链,有的戴情侣戒,有的带埋情人来添
哈哈哈哈哈
幸福在你们脸上洋溢
我都欣慰
不过由于其中一个是在太震撼了
饮茶中我们严刑拷问
好难才逼他承认,
是他是真的喜欢他,
虽然不经亲自承认
不过俗语说,
不出声当默认
所以有此定案
还记得当初得知此事
我同慧晴老友下巴差点脱出来
不过到我们饮完茶回家途中
我定了下来想
从前每一个他喜欢的人都对他不公平
包括我在内
其实他的情路都几坎坷
他不是不见得人
还越来越美添
心底都好好
但是命中注定如此
可能这个守候他多年的人
会使他真正幸福啦
~祝福~
原来世界没东西是不可能发生的
假设对于我喜欢的人
可能有一天我能向全世界高呼我爱你
不是不可能
而是我自己不想因可能而可能
假设性的问题大家都是别想太多
到最后失败
曾经的假设会令你死得更惨

Sunday, September 12, 2010

献世

活到17岁,18岁即将到临
燃烧十多年青春
其实我到底得到什么?
屋业,车子都某(虽然是正常)
情人又不能是一辈子(有歪常理的关系)
亲情满满(是偶尔复杂点)
友情充足(是偶尔未能每时每刻和好与温馨)
教授说:别的国家degree都读完了啦,你们还在梦醒醒读DIPLOMA~
婆婆妈妈说:好命的,仔都生埋啦!
这样说又并非无道理
眼见我们经常怨天尤人
所谓:少年不识愁滋味,为赋新词强说愁
讲得一点都没错
少点零钱又骂穷,
多几斤肉又说减肥,
总之世界每一样东西都有不满
又何苦叻?
我确确实实是这样的人~
不过还算正常
但有时怨天后
都会怕给雷劈
自己懒惰读书,又怨成绩差
自己挥霍无度,又怨钱不够用
自己不去跟情人沟通,又怨天拆散鸳鸯
自己不多看书,又怨自己智慧不够
总之一切自己的衰总有一个原谅自己的理由
真不容易啊
“借口”为的是自己好过点
写得出这篇文章,
证明我还是傻不完的人
只是
自己有没有冲劲去改变自己狭窄的世界
世界那么大
我自问“蚁民”都不如
但希望觉悟能带我走出自我埋怨的世界
彻底待我迈向成功
过去的事,只是小事,
有什么事比前程重要?
我每天要问自己“我今天学到什么?”
我不确定我做到与否
至少我确定我要做~
想当年
当初
以前
我果年~
是时候戒的口头禅
。。。
以前不代表一切
我希望我年老的时候
可以为我的十八岁以上的日子而光荣
而不是徘徊十八岁以下的回忆~
=)

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

惯性

怎么才能习惯不属于自己的习惯?
怎么才能从惯性欺骗中得到真诚?
怎么才能从惯性背叛抽离?
怎么才能习惯忘记一切?
怎么才能习惯惯性心酸?
其实一切只是我的习惯...
习惯一切生存的腐败
什么爱?其实已经腐败...
什么情?也已经不再纯真
偶尔回想初恋
可能,也许,或者...
是比较纯白的恋爱
是人类习惯了这世界,还是这世界习惯了人类?
是创伤习惯了这世界,还是这世界习惯了令人创伤?
如果回到当初主办辩论
我会设题,让正反两方为我找个结案陈词...
可惜,届时我只是无聊的一角...
也许有人说得对,
我再不是从前的我,
我再不是从前的位置,
身份也有差异...
变了性格,外貌...
但我好肯定...惯性依然从来没离开我...
惯性...
可以是好的,
至少我已习惯心痛的感觉,
换作以前,我现在会号啕大哭...
比起现在手按键盘,泪打滚却没流下,
我已是变得坚强
但一旦习惯心酸,
就不得了,
无论多明白立场,
还是惯性心酸,
死鱼收场...
到一天我戒掉习惯,
不懂你会不会珍惜我多点叻?
哈哈哈...
痴心妄想亦未尝不是一个好处,
至少,我能彻底再伤一遍,
再了解世界与挑剔自我性格多一番...

幻灭的彩虹


刚刚回家途中

正值夕阳西下的时分

满是车辆的街道

满是烦恼

刚想发傻的时候

在我眼角出现道“碍眼”的东西

眼角望上45度左右

原来是七色彩虹

红橙黄绿蓝靛紫

从来从来从来从来

我都想停顿下来看清楚彩虹颜色的差别

但从来失败

毕竟每次只是速速一看

身边的事与物都一样

略略一望,你有能否看的通透?

而我

实在认识你太深

每一个颜色每一个细节都是入微的观察


滂沱大雨后没有彩虹

猛击的心又何来甜蜜

有彩虹之前

总会是雨天,绵绵细雨

道说着甜头前总是细细痛楚


然而谁明白大方的背后亦藏伤悲

你不会明。。。


我是庸才

心底话总是说不清

因为我彻底对自己的选择权放弃

这个世界不是我要就有

不是我有就是对的

不是对的就幸福快乐的...



Thursday, June 24, 2010

冥冥中自有主宰

缘尽缘又来,
缘缘不绝经已是不争的事实,
践踏着失意的乌云,
步踏进崭新的国度,
没有谁负谁的谴责
只有谁付出更多,
六月总是风萧萧,雨绵绵...
偶尔步行回家,
偏偏不撑伞,
任由雨滴占在发丝,脸颊,上衣,及身体处处,
不是自虐,却能自我冷静
离开温室到外生活
易难两可,视乎观点的变化
主要成分操纵着心情的起伏
一个月时间
新朋友大都不陌生
却怎么也潜入不了我的深心处
他乡遇故知
总是令我如此期待
漫漫长路
步步为营,步步艰辛,
你我却没有选择的余地
身在异乡的你们,
或身在新环境的你们
是否有试过向新朋友炫耀一番旧朋友?
遇到某些似曾相识的画面,总忍俊不住悄悄微笑?
总爱尝试把旧的回忆灌输在新朋友脑内,
想的只是一个认同,一个熟悉的笑容,
人总会念旧,
我不是第一个,亦不会是最后一个,
取自文杰兄的文笔,
人总要向前走才不容易跌倒,
我在此补充
偶尔回头一望,回眸一笑,
能打破绝望,从新振作~
我又再次深深想念你们
~

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Moody day~

23/6/2010
2day is what day~
all my fren seen like so moody,
and i kena affect too lah...
haizzzz....
i thought all of them have dint sleep well or cry 4 whole nite~
their eye like "pau"
scare me~
futhermore,
one of my fren cry because of his bf...
what the hell is going on?
Black Wednesday?

although i'm single now...
but i felt love can make 1 ppl die fish...
i dint comfort them
cause with my experince
just the one he/she lover can cure the hurt...
tears...
not meant that u should give up in this love games,
instead you should be more strong...
upgrade ur level...
CHEER UP ALL MY FRIEND
4 those feel hurt now...

Monday, June 14, 2010

THE return- VAGABOND-eastern culture

ONE year ago...
HAve a huge gathering,
Have a sucessful gathering,
tats is THE RETURN-VAGABOND-EASTERN CULTURE GATHERING
held by JPP KRS
ya, it was a miracle in my life
i found tat we r more systematic,
and the coorperation in betwwen AJK is very strong...
i proud of this gathering tat we held,
i knw whole jpp krs will proud of it too

PERHATIAN JPP KRS,
(senior or junior)
Never give up and never satisfied by the thing u have...
a wining not as easy as u think...
a lose not mean tat we r weak,
but its tell us,
its time to improve again,
is time to gains experience and learn more a bit...

let's tell them, JPP KRS IS THE BEST!!!

memory

MEMory gone...
BAI ZAI lost, my sister laptop been format,
the last memory i have were totally gone...
i try to find out in the backup file again....
but fail...

photo, video clips, my unpost blog dissapear
feeling like the days i lost my lovest thing in the world...
i cry 4 a while...
i knw its just a memory,
i knw it cant bck anymore...
i knw without me inside ur newest memory,
but sorry...
i dint take care of the memory tat we have...
ur care just 4 him, ur hands just let him hold,
but sometime i hold my hand, and imagin u belong with me...
its funny???
no, im serius...
all became memory...

Sunday, June 13, 2010

ya, im loser

everything i saw, but i duno wat to do,
try to hide my feeling,
and tell the ohters im ok...
try to enjoy in music
but my heart so pain...
tears come down,
and i ask mun yee
izzit i'm useless?
mun yee say no, u so good...
but i knw she just try 2 comfort me...
every Friends cum to me,
and try to give me a support,
just simply touch my shoulder
i knw, they really understand wat im feeling...
every things over...
joined a gathering which make me happy, enjoy, sad, dissapointed and angry...
happy and enjoy because of i found who i am in KRS life
i Found bck YAP PEI YING tats lost in TARC
sad because of.....
angry becoz of...........
dissapointed becoz of..........
ya, its secret, next time ask me when u meet me lah...
anyway...
i knw i still knot put down many thing in my HOMETOWN...
many many many...
HAizz, time's up....
want go to bus station la...
hope u all have a enjoyable time in IPOH... or ur own hometown

Friday, June 11, 2010

Wait the BEST result 4 me

2009/2010 AJK ,
Is time to pass up result ....
r u all ready?
ya... i panik 4 a few days
few days dint sleep well,
i dream bout gathering and u all,
even though my day dream during my class...
i rush 2 bck ipoh...
change my ticket....
paid more 9 ringgit
but i think....
i would like to give u all support on last day preparing
U all actually a gang of AJK got idea...
but smtime u all lazy to do so,
like Phan carmen, u really have paid ur brave to wear tat suit...
banner really no nid senior help,
but u all done well
wen zhen have an idea to have a shining board in the nite
(but i tell him to use LED light) muhahahhaa
but he really creative than us..
wai wai n kin kin, u 2 more brave than us
willing to out gadjet...
2day was comfort me...
u all really serius in preparing....
hope u all all he best in competition
~overall~ cum cum cum~
GAMBATEH!

Saturday, June 5, 2010

NO youngster That u want...


Im still YAP PEI YING,
i like to call my name like that,
i found that is great...
no difference between me and YPY be4,
just getting older and older,
same hair style, but i really look so old...
haizzz....

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Start From 0

erm, woke up ealier and now at TARC cyber centre,
i edited my blog,
i view my blog from years 2008 til years 2010
any 1 of it shown my heart sound,
my tears come down,
but i choose 2 deleted it,
why?
those blog were bring a lot of trouble 2 me...
blog already no any privacy...
ALLAH,
school's computer cannot write chinese
a lot of my newest thinking i willing to share
but with my poor english sure cant complete my job,
ok,
i translate to chinese nex time ya
simply conclusion,
the objective tat i deleted the blog is i willing to start from 0
wat i wrote in my 1st blog,
anybody still rmbr tat?
all bout love,
some of the blog remind me,
i have new thinking and feeling nw...
i really show my real identity 2 u all
from the 1st blog til the last...
But nobody appreciate bout tat...
wat to do...?
muahaha
start from zero...
pls give me power to 4get the pass...